Every morning I wake up and look out the window and hope the sun is shining.  Lately it has been, but when it doesn’t I get sad, sad, sad, because I have SAD. So what am I supposed to do? It helps to pick a fight with my husband, and he actually knows what is going on when I do that, and obliges by being just as stupid as I am when I pick at him, so at least there is drama in our house, but there must be a better way of managing SAD. Help.

Yours truly,

Depressed forever

Dear Depressed:

Cheer up, dear. Don’t you hate being told that? My dear, you would be amazed at the number of people on the wet coast who manage the same condition in different ways.

Your method of creating drama at home and actually being conscious of what you are doing is pretty rare though. You don’t mention what happens when you make up. Or is that when you make out? Is that really the glue that holds your marriage together?

If so, keep on doing what you are doing, love. But for comic relief, maybe you should go into politics. Then you can pick fights with more people. Although then your marriage might suffer, because it may be that your very coupleness is based on being stupid with one another. Drama is such an important glue in families, isn’t it? 

Dear Gabby:

I am a kid. I am not going to school right now, because it is summer holidays. So I have to visit my grandma and grandpa here on Gabriola. I’ve done this every summer since I was four years old.

I like them and stuff, but it’s getting boring doing the things they do. Like they are trying to teach me how to play bridge when all I want to do is hang out on the beach and meet some cute guys. But they don’t like the beach. My grandparents, I mean. So what can I do, to get some beach time?

Yours truly,

Bored kid

Dear Kid:

Learn how to play bridge, but as a reward to your grandparents for dropping you off at the beach every afternoon for three hours. After all, they have been using the same system of rewards for good behaviour on you for years.

Part of growing up, kid, is to polish your bargaining tools. But be careful. They’ve been using these bargaining tricks for years and have them honed pretty well, so they may demand a better bargain for themselves, like making you do the dishes or some other odious thing, like picking up after yourself.

Dear Gabby:

I hate my new boat. I paid a lot for it but I miss the old one. It was comfortable and easy to sail. And I’ve lost friends over it. So now what?

Yours truly,

Missed the boat

Dear Missed:

You are now sailing your money. Suck it up.

For obvious reasons The Flying Shingle tries never to disagree with our Dear Gabby, but unfortunately sometimes we do.